“We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves.”
To a car park attendant who didn’t recognise him in 1997, he snapped: “You bloody silly fool!”
To a female sea cadet: “Do you work in a strip club?”
To multi-ethnic Britain’s Got Talent 2009 winners: “Are you all one family?”
To the President of Nigeria, who was in national dress, 2003: “You look like you’re ready for bed!”
His description of Beijing, during a visit there in 1986: “Ghastly.”
To Lockerbie residents after plane bombing, 1993: “People say after a fire it’s water damage that’s the worst. We’re still drying out Windsor Castle.”
“I never see any home cooking – all I get is fancy stuff.” 1987
Using Hitler’s title to address German chancellor Helmut Kohl in 1997, he called him: “Reichskanzler.”
At a party in 2004: “Bugger the table plan, give me my dinner!”
To a woman solicitor, 1987: “I thought it was against the law for a woman to solicit.”
On the 1981 recession: “A few years ago, everybody was saying we must have more leisure, everyone’s working too much. Now everybody’s got more leisure time they’re complaining they’re unemployed. People don’t seem to make up their minds what they want.”
After Dunblane massacre, 1996: “If a cricketer suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, are you going to ban cricket bats?”
To then Paraguay dictator General Stroessner: “It’s a pleasure to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.”
To Cayman Islanders: “Aren’t most of you descended from pirates?”
To a Scottish driving instructor, 1995: “How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?”
At a Wildlife Fund meeting in 1986: “If it has four legs and it’s not a chair, if it’s got two wings and it flies but is not an aeroplane, and if it swims and it’s not a submarine, the Chinese will eat it.”
“You ARE a woman, aren’t you?” Kenya, 1984.
A VIP at a local airport asked HRH: “What was your flight, like, Your Royal Highness? Philip: “Have you ever flown in a plane?” VIP: “Oh yes, sir, many times.” “Well,” said Philip, “it was just like that.”
To Susan Edwards and her guide dog in 2002: “They have eating dogs for the anorexic now.”
“I’d like to go to Russia very much – although the bastards murdered half my family.”
On seeing a piezo-meter water gauge in Australia: “A pissometer?”
To Elton John on his gold Aston Martin in 2001: “Oh, it’s you that owns that ghastly car, is it?”
At an engineering school closed so he could officially open it, 2005: “It doesn’t look like much work goes on at this university.”
To Aboriginal leader William Brin, Queensland, 2002: “Do you still throw spears at each other?”
After a breakfast of bacon, eggs, smoked salmon, kedgeree, croissants and pain au chocolat – from Gallic chef Regis Crépy, 2002: “The French don’t know how to cook breakfast.”
To black politician Lord Taylor of Warwick, 1999: “And what exotic part of the world do you come from?”
To Andrew Adams, 13, in 1998: “You could do with losing a little bit of weight.”
“Where’s the Southern Comfort?” When presented with a hamper of goods by US ambassador, 1999.
Asking actress Cate Blanchett to fix his DVD player because she worked “in the film industry”, 2008: “There’s a cord sticking out of the back. Might you tell me where it goes?”
“People think there’s a rigid class system here, but dukes have even been known to marry chorus girls. Some have even married Americans.”
On Princess Anne, 1970: “If it doesn’t fart or eat hay, she isn’t interested.”
To a nursing-home resident in a wheelchair, 2002: “Do people trip over you?”
Discussing tartan with then-Scottish Tory leader Annabel Goldie: “That’s a nice tie... Do you have any knickers in that material?”
To a fashion designer, 2009: “Well, you didn’t design your beard too well, did you?”
To the General Dental Council in 1960: “Dontopedalogy is the science of opening your mouth and putting your foot in it, which I’ve practised for many years.”
To schoolchildren in blood-red uniforms, 1998: “It makes you all look like Dracula’s daughters!”
“I don’t think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but they are doing the same thing.”
To female Labour MPs in 2000: “So this is feminist corner then.”
On robots colliding during a demonstration, Science Museum, 2000: “They’re not mating are they?”
To a British student in China, 1986: “If you stay here much longer, you’ll go home with slitty eyes.”
On smoke alarms to a woman who lost two sons in a fire, 1998: “They’re a damn nuisance - I’ve got one in my bathroom and every time I run my bath the steam sets it off.”
To an attractive blonde well-wisher during a Diamond Jubilee visit with the Queen to Bromley, South London: "I would be arrested if I unzipped that dress."
Prince Philip jokingly told a double amputee he should put wheels on his prosthetic limbs to move around more quickly.
To a group of women at a community centre in Chadwell Heath, east London "who do you sponge off?"
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