Schizo homily

[no access to email sent]

Jesus Changes Water Into Wine​

2 On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, 2 and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. 3 When the wine was gone, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no more wine.”

4 “Woman,[a] why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.”

Spoiler

Jesus is either annoyed or nonplussed at the situation. It doesn't concern him. You are the one that didn't prepare correctly.

5 His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

6 Nearby stood six stone water jars, the kind used by the Jews for ceremonial washing, each holding from twenty to thirty gallons.[b]

7 Jesus said to the servants, “Fill the jars with water”; so they filled them to the brim.

8 Then he told them, “Now draw some out and take it to the master of the banquet.”

They did so, 9 and the master of the banquet tasted the water that had been turned into wine. He did not realize where it had come from, though the servants who had drawn the water knew. Then he called the bridegroom aside 10 and said, “Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.”

11 What Jesus did here in Cana of Galilee was the first of the signs through which he revealed his glory; and his disciples believed in him.

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Jesus wasn't an alchemist. He did not actually turn the water into wine. Jesus is what you might consider a "mind control administrator", so to speak.

Have you ever used a drug or drank alcohol? If you have, did you ever do the exact same thing and have two completely different experiences? Have you done the same thing and had 17 different experiences at differing times?

In my mind, Jesus may have done some kind of trick here. Obviously, the wine is going to have a slight hue to it. It isn't going to look clear like water. So, something other than water is in those jars. Ancient food coloring? Who knows?

The people that didn't see what Jesus did had no idea what to expect. When the master tastes the "wine" he is expecting a "a wine of some sort". That was the expectation. His spirit were fooled into believing that it was the best wine possible because there was this initial expectation.

Once the master approved of the wine, everyone else in the party was going to trust the master. Here here! The party goes on. Everyone is drinking water and living it up. Dance party! It's on. Let the music keep playing.

Why the servants and what part do they take in this passage? Well, the servants know the truth. The truth is that it isn't wine.

Alright, even though I'm being told "no, don't write this", I'm going to write it anyway. My guess is that one of the servants saw everyone else drinking the "wine" and wanted to try some. That servant tasted the "wine" expecting to get the same effect as everyone else and was like "WTF is this? Has everyone else gone mad?!"

The end.

 

[Call Me Tim]

Jesus Changes Water Into Wine​

2 On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, 2 and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. 3 When the wine was gone, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no more wine.”

4 “Woman,[a] why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.”

Spoiler

Jesus is either annoyed or nonplussed at the situation. It doesn't concern him. You are the one that didn't prepare correctly.

5 His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

6 Nearby stood six stone water jars, the kind used by the Jews for ceremonial washing, each holding from twenty to thirty gallons.[b]

7 Jesus said to the servants, “Fill the jars with water”; so they filled them to the brim.

8 Then he told them, “Now draw some out and take it to the master of the banquet.”

They did so, 9 and the master of the banquet tasted the water that had been turned into wine. He did not realize where it had come from, though the servants who had drawn the water knew. Then he called the bridegroom aside 10 and said, “Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.”

11 What Jesus did here in Cana of Galilee was the first of the signs through which he revealed his glory; and his disciples believed in him.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jesus wasn't an alchemist. He did not actually turn the water into wine. Jesus is what you might consider a "mind control administrator", so to speak.

Have you ever used a drug or drank alcohol? If you have, did you ever do the exact same thing and have two completely different experiences? Have you done the same thing and had 17 different experiences at differing times?

In my mind, Jesus may have done some kind of trick here. Obviously, the wine is going to have a slight hue to it. It isn't going to look clear like water. So, something other than water is in those jars. Ancient food coloring? Who knows?

The people that didn't see what Jesus did had no idea what to expect. When the master tastes the "wine" he is expecting a "a wine of some sort". That was the expectation. His spirit were fooled into believing that it was the best wine possible because there was this initial expectation.

Once the master approved of the wine, everyone else in the party was going to trust the master. Here here! The party goes on. Everyone is drinking water and living it up. Dance party! It's on. Let the music keep playing.

Why the servants and what part do they take in this passage? Well, the servants know the truth. The truth is that it isn't wine.

Alright, even though I'm being told "no, don't write this", I'm going to write it anyway. My guess is that one of the servants saw everyone else drinking the "wine" and wanted to try some. That servant tasted the "wine" expecting to get the same effect as everyone else and was like "WTF is this? Has everyone else gone mad?!"

The end.

You have a right to not believe.

Doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. Believers will believe, non-believers will not believe.

 

[no access to email sent]

My own experiences color my stories. You are consistently negative on this forum (probably as a troll, but whatever), so you do you.

I actually troll far too little on this site. That's why my avatar is so amusing.

 

[Call Me Tim]

My own experiences color my stories. I am consistently butthurt on this forum

There was nothing negative about my post Miss Hypersensitive.

All are truths.
You have the right to believe what you want.
What you believe doesn't matter.
People will believe what they want.

 

[Seventh-day Puritan]

Jesus wasn't an alchemist. He did not actually turn the water into wine. Jesus is what you might consider a "mind control administrator", so to speak.

Have you ever used a drug or drank alcohol? If you have, did you ever do the exact same thing and have two completely different experiences? Have you done the same thing and had 17 different experiences at differing times?

In my mind, Jesus may have done some kind of trick here. Obviously, the wine is going to have a slight hue to it. It isn't going to look clear like water. So, something other than water is in those jars. Ancient food coloring? Who knows?

The people that didn't see what Jesus did had no idea what to expect. When the master tastes the "wine" he is expecting a "a wine of some sort". That was the expectation. His spirit were fooled into believing that it was the best wine possible because there was this initial expectation.

Once the master approved of the wine, everyone else in the party was going to trust the master. Here here! The party goes on. Everyone is drinking water and living it up. Dance party! It's on. Let the music keep playing.

Why the servants and what part do they take in this passage? Well, the servants know the truth. The truth is that it isn't wine.

Alright, even though I'm being told "no, don't write this", I'm going to write it anyway. My guess is that one of the servants saw everyone else drinking the "wine" and wanted to try some. That servant tasted the "wine" expecting to get the same effect as everyone else and was like "WTF is this? Has everyone else gone mad?!"

The end.

• The werkes of GOD may nat be subject to mannes expectation withoute undermynynge HIS divine soverayntye and grace. (Isaiah 55:8–9)

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” –Isaiah 55:8–9, Geneva Bible

• Faith is not for to seke miracles that conformen to mannes understanding, but for to yelde to GODDES wille, which passeth our comprehensyon. (2 Corinthians 5:7)

"For we walk by faith, not by sight.” –2 Corinthians 5:7, Geneva Bible

• If divine intervencion was governed by mannes expectation, it wolde destruie the nede of faith, turnynge miracles to sleight of the mynde, not an exprescioun of eternall trouthe.​

 

[no access to email sent]

There was nothing negative about my post Miss Hypersensitive.

All are truths.
You have the right to believe what you want.
What you believe doesn't matter.
People will believe what they want.

I'll tell you why I'm butthurt right now.

I tried to pray for someone on Tuesday night this week. I thought I was doing something good.

It ended up that this was very very unappreciated. In turn, I got something very very negative as a result. Something that hits to my core. Something that made me want to kill myself.

When that is the reward for me trying to do something that I view as "nice", this is the result.

 

[no access to email sent]

So for the time being, I am going to continue to be an internet stranger.

 

[Call Me Tim]

I'll tell you why I'm butthurt right now.

I tried to pray for someone on Tuesday night this week. I thought I was doing something good.

It ended up that this was very very unappreciated. In turn, I got something very very negative as a result. Something that hits to my core. Something that made me want to kill myself.

When that is the reward for me trying to do something that I view as "nice", this is the result.

Tards often reject kindness and altruistic efforts; it's common with tyrants. They don't want your empathy, they want your fealty.

Don't tell them you're praying for them then. I've never met someone who took great offense to me praying for them, but then again I'm sure those people are out there. Their actions shouldn't control yours, which is what they want.

But I understand what you are saying. Believe me. Stop being so down on yourself because all that self-flagellation will be harmful.

 

[no access to email sent]

• The werkes of GOD may nat be subject to mannes expectation withoute undermynynge HIS divine soverayntye and grace. (Isaiah 55:8–9)

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” –Isaiah 55:8–9, Geneva Bible

• Faith is not for to seke miracles that conformen to mannes understanding, but for to yelde to GODDES wille, which passeth our comprehensyon. (2 Corinthians 5:7)

"For we walk by faith, not by sight.” –2 Corinthians 5:7, Geneva Bible

• If divine intervencion was governed by mannes expectation, it wolde destruie the nede of faith, turnynge miracles to sleight of the mynde, not an exprescioun of eternall trouthe.​

When can I expect your first sermon?

 

[no access to email sent]

Tards often reject kindness and altruistic efforts; it's common with tyrants. They don't want your empathy, they want your fealty.

Don't tell them you're praying for them then. I've never met someone who took great offense to me praying for them, but then again I'm sure those people are out there. Their actions shouldn't control yours, which is what they want.

But I understand what you are saying. Believe me. Stop being so down on yourself because all that self-flagellation will be harmful.

Yes, and I bow to no one, and it's annoying to some.

 

[no access to email sent]

Also, I've been told that the "words" part of the praying is unnecessary.

Just sucks when there is a psychic link and any words you might speak are heard.

 

[no access to email sent]

• The werkes of GOD may nat be subject to mannes expectation withoute undermynynge HIS divine soverayntye and grace. (Isaiah 55:8–9)

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” –Isaiah 55:8–9, Geneva Bible

• Faith is not for to seke miracles that conformen to mannes understanding, but for to yelde to GODDES wille, which passeth our comprehensyon. (2 Corinthians 5:7)

"For we walk by faith, not by sight.” –2 Corinthians 5:7, Geneva Bible

• If divine intervencion was governed by mannes expectation, it wolde destruie the nede of faith, turnynge miracles to sleight of the mynde, not an exprescioun of eternall trouthe.​

And because it's me and I'm supremely autistic, what the fuck is the point of a homily or a sermon then?

Can you explain that one to me if what you wrote is true?

 

[Seventh-day Puritan]

And because it's me and I'm supremely autistic, what the fuck is the point of a homily or a sermon then?

Prechynge is not only the sharinh of knowledge; it is the active proclamataciounof GODDES word, where the HOLY SPIRIT bringeth spiritual transfiguracioun and feith in CRIST. The purpos thereof is to shapyn the belevers into the image of JESU CRIST, to foster spiritual maturyte and grace in the lyves of them that heeren it.​

 

[no access to email sent]

Just in case you ever wanted to take a trip to see what was inside of my head I will give you a peak.

At the start of a new cycle in my brain the following happens:

I do something that I have been doing for weeks, months, usually not longer than that.

All of a sudden, I get a familiar feeling and it goes like this:

"Oh uh, I made a big mistake again. What the hell is going on? I'm not in control of myself. I'm not currently able to be myself. Ok, ok, I need some water. That is a good start. Umm, yeah, and some sugar, and salt. Everything a body needs to survive. Why the hell did I do this again? Am I really that stupid? This is going on my permanent record. Well, it's also going to take some time. Maybe 15 minutes, maybe a half hour, even an hour? I'll be back, but good luck right now. This body needs some help. Again, big mistake."

Then, as the mistakes begin to compound, I'll start to get a voice that accompanies my own in my head. It sounds like the person taunting you in Mike Tyson's Punch Out. So instead of using my own voice, the voice I hear is my voice with the squiggles and wobbles that are spoken.

The fact that I chose what I chose right here is absolute poetry in motion for me. This is what serendipity looks like.

 

[no access to email sent]

The things that you see when you close your eyes?

When you close your eyes, do you only see darkness?

Do you see colors?

Can you describe what you see when you close your eyes?

Is it patterns?

I like some of the patterns that I see.

I like some of the faces that appear.

I don't know if those faces are my own imagination or if those faces are others that are currently in need of help.

I would like to think people like Pablo Picasso closed their eyes and painted what they saw.

That's all for this post.

 

[no access to email sent]

Ok, I reread this and took a shower. This is why there should be rough drafts before you hit enter.

1) I laughed at what I wrote, so it should probably be funny as is.
2) And more importantly this:

Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no more wine.”

4 “Woman,[a] why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.”

5 His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

When is the last time you called your own mother "woman"? What kind of disrespect is that? How did this make it into the bible? What is going on?

Jesus isn't just annoyed. He is flat out raging mad.

 

[no access to email sent]

Lol, thank you for telling me I'm wrong, Copilot. It wasn't disrespectful, I guess.

 

[no access to email sent]

Coming to the sober realization that the "3 days" thing is actually a thing.

Have to remember this for the next cycle.

 

[no access to email sent]

The things that you see when you close your eyes?

When you close your eyes, do you only see darkness?

Do you see colors?

Can you describe what you see when you close your eyes?

Is it patterns?

I like some of the patterns that I see.

I like some of the faces that appear.

I don't know if those faces are my own imagination or if those faces are others that are currently in need of help.

I would like to think people like Pablo Picasso closed their eyes and painted what they saw.

That's all for this post.

This is an addendum to this post.

Have you ever rubbed your eyes and seen colors and patterns when your eyes are closed? Of course, everyone has.

These color and patterns are the first surface layer of your subconscious mind. Self hypnosis can make it so that you aren't consciously aware. But there is another direction that you can go ... meditation.

As you get better and better at meditation, you can go deeper and deeper into your mind. People will say things like "empty yourself" and you kind of pour your spiritual energy out of your body via this meditation. You mind must be completely blank and not thinking at all.

The way I am able to do this is as follows. I sit cross-legged with my head tilted forward, my eyes closed, and my hands cupped over my face like I'm playing peekaboo. Then, I start to take slow and relaxing breaths to calm myself down.

As I took this journey the past few weeks, I've noticed different layers. This could be different for you, but I will describe mine.

The initial layers include the "seeing eye" where you are able to see what looks like an eye looking back at you. Past the different colors and patterns, there is something that I would consider "the cloud layer". It looks like dark shroud of clouds that you can descend past.

Once you pass this cloud layer, you will encounter a dark passage of some kind. It has looked different each time that I have taken this journey.

While I'm in meditation, I have to sometimes remind myself and speak out loud, "no intrusive thoughts". Intrusive thoughts don't have to be bad thoughts. No, it means not thinking about you, your problems, your family ... anything.

Once you make it through this deep dive passage, you will end up in a place where you can not go any further down. I call this place "the well". For me, the well is a blueish green color. I call it the well because it looks like you are looking at a reflection of water at the bottom of this deep dive. I've tried to go past this point and go deeper, but there is nothing deeper. You've hit bedrock.

I don't know the significance of making it this far down. But I do know that this a real thing. Moreover, it is the same thing or same place each time I visit down there.

I would recommend.